you can always sell any dream to me
by SometimeAfterMidnight
Summary: She was his enigma…something that was within his grasp but something he couldn't hold onto. But he would be there in whatever capacity she needed him to be. That would be enough…right? AU Finchel.


_Hey everyone! I know it's been awhile (a long while) since I've posted anything but I figured in the light of everything that's happened the world could use some happy Finchel. Although this kind of stands on its own I'm going to leave it open because I have some more ideas...if you're interested! Please let me know what you think!_

_My thoughts are with everyone who is struggling with Cory's passing. This fandom has amazed me this past week._

_Disclaimer - I don't own anything._

**i.**

Cabaret clubs weren't his thing…like at all. Sometimes after a long shift (he was a paramedic) he liked to go to the bar with the guys and have a couple drinks before calling it a night. Usually they chose a hole-in-the-wall joint or a sports bar but then his co-worker, Mike Chang, started dating this girl and their locations began to diversify. Tina was on Broadway (in some capacity) so one night he suggested meeting up with her and some of her friends at their regular haunt. He didn't have a good reason to say no so he agreed.

Finn sat at a too-small cocktail table and picked at the label on his bottle of beer. The placed was called _Talento da Scoprire_, which was supposedly Italian for 'undiscovered talent'. He learned, after poorly mispronouncing the name more than once, that most of the regulars affectionately referred to it as _Tadasco_. He liked that name a little better, mostly because it made the place sound slightly less pretentious.

Tina had explained to them that Tadasco was famous in the theater inner-circle for being _the_ place to display your talent. It was frequented by up-and-comers as well as headliners and people she referred to as "legacy performers". Everyone lined up to put their name and their song choice on a slip of paper in hopes that the Master of Ceremonies would select them from his sequined top hat and give them the opportunity to command the clubs attention. You were only allowed to submit your name once and they only chose six performers per night. Tina had been coming to the club on a regular basis for almost three years and her name had only been selected twice, both, she swore, the best times of her life.

He wished he cared more about the whole theater thing. Finn had been living in the New York metropolitan area his entire life but had never developed an affinity for theater. Maybe he didn't care. Maybe no one had ever taken the chance to make him appreciate it. Regardless, he was almost thirty years old and he would have rather being sitting _anywhere_ but in Tadasco watching overly emotional men and women belt out supposed Broadway standards.

He wished his beer had a straw. He would have totally been blowing bubbles in it.

"Ladies and Gentleman," the MC, Salvatore Giancarlo, announced in his thick Italian accent. "Our next performer this evening will be..." He dug through his hat dramatically, sifting through what was assumedly a couple hundred slips of paper. The club was filled with people and even if only half of them had put in their name it would still have be a considerable amount. Salvatore selected his chosen entertainer and clapped his hands together excitedly. "My, my aren't we all in for a treat! Where are you, Rachel Berry?"

A loud squeal came from the direction of the bar and Tina drummed her hands against the table and bounced in her seat. "Honestly, if she wasn't my friend I would hate her. She has the _best_ luck when it comes to singing here. This is easily the sixth time she's been picked and she's only in New York every couple of months!"

Finn signaled the waitress for another beer while the crowd buzzed with excitement in anticipation of the next performer. He rested his elbow against the table and propped his chin up with his hand. It was getting late and this place had really begun to grate on his patience. He would finish his beer and then call it a night. Mike would understand and it wasn't like he was leaving him alone…he had Tina.

He watched, bored, as a petite brunette climbed onto the small stage in the front of the room. She hugged the piano player in greeting and then took her place behind the standing microphone. The crowd cheered for her and she smiled and gave a small curtsy. Whoever she was, she was clearly adored by the room.

"You all are too kind," she said sweetly, twisting something on the stand so she could adjust the microphone to her height. Even from a distance he could tell that she was really short. "So what should I sing tonight?" She called to the crowd playfully. Some of them shouted out suggestions but she just nodded and then pointed her finger at the piano played. "I know…hit it!"

She shut her eyes and wrapped her hands around the microphone stand. She swayed slightly and as she opened her mouth to sing her eyes blinked open and landed on his. Even though there was quite a bit of distance between them he had never felt something so immediate. Under her intense stare he felt his heart begin to pound wildly in his chest and his breathing grow shallow. It was almost like time stopped as she sang. He was completely under her power and was suddenly satisfied to sit and watch if it meant he wouldn't have to let go of this new, foreign feeling.

He had never heard the song she was singing (something about finding someone to watch over her or something) but he was captivated. She was so natural as she sang that he didn't feel like she was singing someone else's words at all. She was so committed to what she was doing that it felt like she had ripped a page from her diary and decided to share it with everyone in the room. And her voice…it was unlike anything else he'd ever heard. Since she was so tiny he hadn't expected the full-bodied, powerful voice that she projected through the club. If he hadn't already been sitting down he surely would have needed to after hearing her sing.

When she finished her song she threw her arms up dramatically and smiled at the roar that instantly filled the room. Everyone was immediately on their feet and Finn found himself clapping and standing along with everyone else. He didn't understand anything about the kind of music she'd just sung…all he knew was that she was amazing and if anyone deserved a standing ovation it was her.

"Wow," he heard himself say. "Who is she?"

Unbeknownst to him Tina jabbed Mike in the side. They both narrowed their eyes on Finn's dreamy expression and Tina nodded knowingly. "Rachel Berry."

Finn rolled his eyes and sank back onto his chair as Rachel climbed down from the stairs and greeted her admirers. "I figured that much. Is she in your show with you, Tina?" He watched as Rachel hugged a few different people and accepted a kiss on the cheek. He really wasn't sure why he wished _he _was the one kissing her. He didn't even know her.

Tina laughed at his question. Apparently he was funnier than he thought. "Finn…that's _Rachel Berry_. You can't tell me you've never heard of her." He shrugged. Tina sighed. "She _was_ on Broadway, for years actually. She's only twenty-seven years old and she's already won _three_ Tonys! Three!"

He shrugged again. Was he supposed to be impressed by this? The only reason he even knew the Tony Awards existed was because of his brother, Kurt. He assumed she was important because the Tonys were like the Super Bowl of theater, but still, beyond that crowd he figured no one knew who she was.

"I met Rachel back when we were both undergrads at NYADA. She's an amazing performer and has a drive unlike anyone else I've ever known. She's had a lot of success in her life but she deserves it because she's honestly earned every one of her successes. She's taking some time off from Broadway right now and is touring the country performing with orchestra's and whatnot, or so I've heard. Kind of the same thing Kristin and Idina have done in the past."

"Am I supposed to know who they are?"

Tina shook her head and sighed. Again. "I _guess_ not."

**ii.**

His heart pounded even harder in his chest, which he didn't think was possible. He followed Tina as she wound her way through the club, greeting people as she passed them. He kept his hands in his pockets and his head down. He was so far out of his element and he couldn't remember the last time he felt so uncomfortable. But he had to meet her, he had to, which was why he was following Tina through the crowded room.

As they neared the bar a loud, enthusiastic laugh hit his ears and he found himself smiling at the sound. Rachel was perched on one of the bar stools, her black skirt slid far up her thighs to display her perfect, toned legs, which were crossed delicately at the knee. She held a clear drink in one of her hands and had the other extended to rest against her friends arm, her laughter a result of whatever they had just said. Her dark hair fell in long, loose waves and was highlighted with chestnut streaks. A wisp of bangs fell against her forehead. She was easily the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

As if she'd sensed their presence, Rachel shifted her body in their direction, her whole face lighting up when she saw Tina. "C.C. is that you?" Finn looked around to see who she was referring to but when Tina began to squeal alongside Rachel and they fell into each other's arms he assumed C.C. was Tina…because apparently that made complete sense. "Oh, honey, it is so good to see you! What's it been? Two? Three years?"

The two girls separated but they still clutched hands, their arms swinging between them. "It's been a long time. How's life on the road treating you?"

Rachel sighed and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Oh…it's…it's ok. It's hard living out of a bus and sleeping in hotels all the time but I love that I get to see the country and meet my fans. But I miss New York. I miss Broadway."

"You can always come back, you know. Of course any production would be lucky to have you. I heard some workshop rumors that I'll have to fill you in on but not here…too many ears."

Rachel nodded slowly and Finn immediately felt her shift her focus from Tina to him. She smiled at him warmly as she continued to hold onto Tina's hands. "You'll have to fill me in…I've been looking for a reason to come back." She spoke to Tina but had her eyes firmly planted on him. It was strange. "Who are you?"

As she addressed him it was like he forgot how to speak. He opened his mouth dumbly, wanting to respond to her, but no words came out. She just continued to smile at him and blink her big, chocolate-colored eyes. He felt his mouth grow increasingly dry and he mentally slapped himself for being such a loser. She probably thought he was star struck or some other easy explanation, but in reality he was completely mesmerized by this stranger, even though he had no idea who she was. He had never even heard of her until ten minutes ago and he had no idea why he felt such an immediate pull in her direction.

Tina poked him in the side. He glared at her.

"This is my boyfriend's friend, Finn Hudson," she introduced, noticing that he had temporality lost the ability to speak. "Tonight is his first time at Tadasco, but if the look on his face when you were singing was any indication it _certainly _won't be his last."

Finn grimaced. Tina was lucky he liked Mike so much.

Rachel smiled brightly at him and extended her hand in his direction. "Very nice to meet you, Finn. I'm Rachel Berry."

The second her skin made contact with his he felt like he'd been set on fire. His whole body burned at her touch, but it was the kind of pain that could only be described as delicious. He always clammed up around girls, that was nothing new, but the way he felt powerless around Rachel was something different. It was like he'd always been looking for her even though he'd never realized it.

Her hand was like satin enveloped in his much larger one and he didn't even notice that he subconsciously shifted his hand so their fingers could slide together. He rubbed his thumb lazily against her knuckles. He felt like her hand belonged there and he was being much bolder than he was used to but he just had to, you know? He had no control over these feelings that washed over his being. He belonged to Rachel Berry. Instantly he was hers.

Tina must had noticed that there was _something_ going on between them because she immediately excused herself from their somewhat awkward interaction saying she would catch up with Rachel before she left. Rachel nodded in agreement but her gaze never left Finn's.

"I feel like I know you," he was finally able to whisper, once Tina was a safe distance away of course. "How is that even possible?"

Rachel squeezed his hand and reached for her drink, slurping up the last bit through the bright red straw. He tried not to notice the way her lips delicately wrapped around the straw and her big eyes shifted upwards to settle on his as she sucked. She placed her empty drink back on the bar and shrugged her shoulders. She took a step closer to him and reached for his other hand. "Maybe we were friends in another life."

He smiled as he felt Rachel press her hips against his. He usually didn't believe in stuff like that but since it was an explanation as to why he felt so strongly, he chose to believe it only because he couldn't think of a reason not to. "You think so?" He moved his hands to her waist, taking her hands with him, and pulled her even closer. "Can I get you another drink?"

She tilted her head up at him and he leaned down so he could better hear whatever she had to say. "I have a better idea," she purred against his ear. "Want to get out of here? It's my first night back in New York in so long."

He didn't think he'd ever agreed to something so fast in his life.

**iii.**

They stood on the landing outside of his third floor walk-up in Lower Harlem. He didn't think someone the caliber of Rachel Berry would want to be seen in a transitional neighborhood like Harlem so he'd suggested the go to another bar or to wherever she was staying, but she'd insisted on going to his apartment. She said the hotel she was staying in didn't seem like New York to her and since she was only going to be in the city for a short amount of time she wanted to _feel_ the city and where better to do that than Harlem? She assured him that she would feel safe anywhere if he were next to her. That made him feel like a million dollars. He couldn't say no to her.

"You're sure putting a lot of faith in me, Rachel Berry," he teased as he slid his key into the deadbolt. "I could be a murderous freak for all you know."

He felt her move behind him and slide her hands along the backs of his arms. He froze as her fingers traveled down the length of his leather jacket and then settled against his hips. She pressed her chin into his back and slipped her hands into his front pockets at the same time. He could feel her perky breasts brushing against his back and it took every ounce of willpower he possessed to do what he did next.

He spun around quickly causing Rachel to retract her hands from his pockets. The look on her face was filled with a ridiculous amount of confusion and he immediately felt guilty. It was very obvious the two of them were on completely different pages.

"What are you doing?" He asked her as gently as possible.

Her chin dropped and she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. "I…thought…I just thought…"

"You thought what?"

She looked back up at him, her face reddened. "You want to sleep with me, don't you? You were nice to me at Tadasco, you offered to buy me a drink, you _jumped _at the chance to leave when I suggested it. All the signs were there, Finn!"

He was mildly shocked. Of _course _he'd thought about sleeping with her, what guy wouldn't? She was gorgeous and funny and he was instantly attracted to her, but he hadn't planned on sleeping with her…not the first night they'd met at least. While he physically wanted her there was also something else there and her blatant expectations only cemented what he'd thought.

"You're gay," she said quietly, a look of relief flooding her features. "Of course you're gay."

His eyebrow shot up. "I'm not gay, Rachel." The confusion was back, along with tear-filled eyes. Panic set in…he couldn't handle crying girls. "Oh no…no…please don't cry."

She sank down onto the top step of the staircase they'd just climbed and shoved her face into her hands. "What's happened to me, Finn? Have things really gotten so bad that I think every guy who's nice to me wants to have sex with me? Of course that's how it's always happened in the past so it's not like I'm pulling these things out of thin air, but still. Oh, God…I'm so _embarrassed."_

Cautiously he sunk down onto the step next to her and patted her back awkwardly. Who was this strange girl and what had happened to her that she automatically assumed he wanted to sleep with her? He figured he was reasonably attractive and under any other circumstances he would be flattered by her advances, but her reaction was not normal and he felt _bad _for her. He figured pity was the last thing she wanted but maybe he could get her to talk to him so he could try to figure her out.

"There's nothing to be embarrassed about. I promise." She glanced up at him out of the corner of her eye and wiped the tears from her cheeks. "Why don't you come inside? I'll make some coffee and we can relax. What do you say?"

She gave him a hesitant smile and nodded. "I'd like that."

**iv.**

Rachel had her cup of coffee clutched in-between her hands and her head thrown back, a belly laugh filling his entire apartment. It was amazing how much her demeanor had changed and how easily she'd relaxed. It was almost like she'd put on this front when it came to interacting with men and once she'd realized that he didn't expect anything from her she'd allowed herself to actually be Rachel Berry.

And Rachel Berry was a dork.

She laughed too loudly and gave an occasional snort to enhance her obvious entertainment. She talked at length about her cat and spoke lovingly of her father's and her childhood in Ohio. She told him about her education at NYADA and how her career had taken on a life of its own the second she went to a cattle-call audition for 'Funny Girl' at the end of her freshman year.

"Things changed so fast, Finn," she whispered, somewhat sadly, into her coffee mug. "I've done so much and have the accolades to backup the decisions I've made, but at the same time I feel like I'm living someone else's life. Sometimes I feel like it's this crazy, elaborate dream that I have no control over. I go where I'm told to go and trust that my manager has my best interest at heart. I trust Will, I do, but I'm more than a career…or at least I thought I was."

It broke Finn's heart to hear the sadness in Rachel's voice. It amazed him how she could transition from giggles and silly stories to a somber state of overall melancholia. He could tell from learning her brief history that she truly loved performing and it was her true life passion, but he also could hear the desperation in her voice and sense how tired she was. She was so young but she was clearly on the verge of burning out. She needed a balance in her life and to figure out that she could have a life and still be a decorated professional. And apparently she had no one willing to help her figure that out.

With a disapproving shake of his head Finn set his mug down on the coffee table and stood up, extending his hand in Rachel's direction. "Come on."

She mirrored his action with her own coffee mug and placed her hand into his. "Where are we going?"

He moved quickly though the apartment and pulled her along behind him. He grabbed both of their jackets, shrugging his on and handing her hers as they walked. He opened his front door and guided her down the hallway towards an unmarked door at the far end of the corridor. He pushed the door open to reveal a rickety, metal staircase.

Rachel inhaled sharply. "First of all, what is this? And second of all, is it safe? It looks like it's ready to shatter into a million pieces the second you step onto it."

He smiled at her and squeezed her hand. "It's an indoor fire escape and it's perfectly safe." He tugged her into the stairwell and guided her up the stairs, her heels echoing loudly against the metal. "I come up here every couple of days."

"Where are we going?" She asked again.

He glanced at her over his shoulder and felt his heart squeeze when she smiled up at him. "Patience, grasshopper."

They climbed the rest of the stairs, Rachel's heels the only sound in the stairwell, and when they reached the top he pushed the door open forcefully and propped it open with an old brick that he routinely used as a doorstop. He pulled her onto the roof of the building and gestured to her with his arms spread open. Harlem twinkled all around them and he smiled as he watched Rachel tilt her head towards the sky.

"Finn," she breathed. "This is beautiful."

He walked towards the ledge of the building and rested his hands against the heavy stone. He spent more time on the roof of his building than he did in his actual apartment. There was something about not being surrounded by walls and instead being surrounded by Manhattan that always healed his soul. After a trying day of work or just whenever he needed to realign his thoughts he would spend the evening staring at the lights and listening to the sounds of the city. It calmed him and always put everything in perspective. He was hoping it would have a similar effect on Rachel.

He heard Rachel walk up next to him and lean against the ledge. She pressed her left arm against his and propped her chin up with her right. She stared out at the city and then closed her eyes, inhaling deeply.

"I love it here," she said quietly. "I'm going to remember this moment when I'm locked in my bedroom on the bus flying down the highway. Being here, with you, makes me feel so free." She turned her head in his direction and blinked her big eyes at him. "Thank you for this."

He shrugged and looked up at the sky. "I know it's easy to feel overwhelmed and that everything is constantly spiraling out of control. I'm sure a lot of the time you feel like you have the whole world on your shoulders." He bumped her playfully with his hip. "But standing here it's not like that at all…all the buildings, the people, the millions of different lives that are happening all around us…I'm just one little part. You're just one little part. Sometimes it doesn't hurt to be reminded of that."

He looked over at her then and she was watching him with stars in her eyes. "How do you know exactly what to say to me? I only met you a few hours ago and you already know just what to say to make me feel better. Thank you for that, Finn."

"Maybe we were friends in another life," he teased, using the phrase she'd used on him earlier in the night. It made him feel like a million dollars when she looked at him like she was at that moment. He wasn't sure what it was about her but they had an instant connection and he wasn't sure he'd ever experienced something like that before in his life.

"Finn," Rachel said gently, turning her body in his direction. She slid her hand up his back and fingered the hair at the base of his neck. She leaned her head against the sleeve of his jacket and tiled her head back to rest her chin against his arm and gazed up at him. "This is the first time in a long time that someone has done something for me and not for _Rachel Berry_. You have no idea how much that means to me."

He shifted slightly and moved his arm to wrap around Rachel's waist and then tugged her to his side. He looked up at the star-filled sky and exhaled. He couldn't remember the last time he felt so content.

"So did I hear you say something to Tina about trying to relocate back to New York?" He glanced down at her out of the corner of his eye hoping he didn't sound too eager. He was trying desperately not to focus on the fact that he didn't exactly know how long she would be in town for.

Rachel let out a heavy side and pushed herself against his side. "I'm lonely a lot and homesick more often than I'd like to admit, but I like touring the country. I like singing in historic, elaborate theaters and meeting all the people who've heard of me but were never able to travel to New York to see one of my shows. My manager tells me that touring is going to help get my name out there and then it will make the transition to TV or movies or anything else even more realistic."

"You want to do all that?"

She shrugged. "I don't know, maybe. I already have three Tony's. It's only fair to give someone else a shot, right?"

She jabbed him in his side to indicate that she'd been joking but Finn found himself swallowing the lump that had formed in his throat. He still wasn't sure why he was having such a strong reaction to someone he didn't even know but hearing her talk so nonchalantly about her aspirations kind of broke his heart. Boy, was he ever a pussy.

"Rachel…"

"Finn…"

He laughed as they both spoke at the same time. "Go ahead," he urged.

She tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear and leaned in to press her nose against his neck. He inhaled sharply at the contact and gently massaged his fingers against her waist. He wished time could just stop.

"Do you believe in destiny?" She breathed.

Her breath tickled his skin as he dipped his chin slightly to rest against her hair. "I don't know. I never really thought about it much."

She giggled as his other hand came up to her waist and turned her so they faced one another. "You have to," she demanded, running her hands over his biceps. "I know you don't regularly hang out at Tadasco."

He grinned. She had a point. "Do you think we would have casually ran into each other had I not shown up at that club tonight?"

"Who's to know?"

Finn took a step closer to her wound his arms around to her back to pull her flush against him. He almost groaned at the sensation of having her pressed against him. He pushed that urge out of his head as he studied her eyes and committed her features to memory. He didn't know how much longer he would be able to have her like this and he didn't want to forget a second.

Without another thought he leaned down slightly and pressed his lips against Rachel's forehead. He rested his mouth against her skin for a minute before dropping his face further and rubbing his nose against hers. After another moment he pulled back and studied the stars that had formed in her eyes. "Just do what makes you happy, Rachel Berry. Everything else will fall into place."

She sighed contentedly before she rose up on her tiptoes and pressed her lips firmly against his. He exhaled at her touch and pulled her even tighter against him. He teased her lips with his own and saw fireworks behind his eyelids as their kiss intensified.

They stood there, wrapped around each other, with the expanse of stars above them and life happening all around them. But Finn was only focused on one thing…and he didn't know how long he could keep her.


End file.
